Monday, February 15, 2016

Muffin Tops and Mickey Mouse

Last weekend my mom came up for a visit.  Sometimes, even as an adult, you just need your mom.  Sometimes I like to think she needs me too.  I’m lucky that once I grew up, she and my sister, Ber, became my very best friends.

Per usual, Mom and I spent the day Saturday shopping in a nearby town.  We had coffee, ate lunch, and wasted time together – my favorite sort of day.

After lunch, we lazed our way through a department store and finally made our way to the fitting rooms.  The store was busy and the fitting rooms hadn’t been emptied for a while; so when we entered our room I spotted a few pairs of crazy leggings.

I held up one pair and said, “Oh I have to try these on and send a picture to Little K.  He’ll think it’s great!

So the way-too-small Captain America leggings picture was sent, and Mr. B reported that Little K thought they were very cool.

In Good Company: Captain America Leggings
Don't those shields look impressive on my thunder thighs?

Mom and I were missing Ber, so we decided she needed to see the picture too.  Ber was trying to be so nice and not hurt my feelings, not knowing that 3 hours away we were laughing so hard we were snorting (and likely bothering anyone in a 40-foot radius).

Me: Yes or no? 
In Good Company: Captain America Leggings
Ummm…probably no
Me: Damn.  Ok thanks.
Ber: Do you like them?  They look fine.  I don’t like the pattern.
Me: Maybe I just need a bigger size…

As we are cackling at ourselves, I decided to mess with Ber just a little more, and try on the even smaller, uglier leggings that were also abandoned in our fitting room.

So I take the picture, and because I am howling with laughter, I accidentally sent it to someone with the last name Berns.  Yes, some random dude had is lovely Saturday interrupted with an unsolicited picture of my big ass in too-tight Mickey Mouse leggings.  I don’t know this Mr. Berns.  Mr. B’s iTunes account synced with mine and it had never been a problem before.  I have no clue if this is a high school buddy, a work contact, a CEO, a consultant, or the next Kansas governor.  I quickly send a text telling him “Sorry… wrong number.”  He quickly replied, “No problem.  Nice picture though LOL.

In Good Company: Muffin Tops and Mickey Mouse
Muffin tops and Mickey Mouse.

I am in tears laughing, and thinking about how annoyed Mr. B will be was only making me laugh harder.

Not giving up the opportunity for Ber to be impressed with my fashion choices, the charade continued:

Me: Are these better?
In Good Company: Muffin Tops and Mickey Mouse
Ber:  I guess…  I’m not a huge fan of theme stuff on my workout gear.  I would rather just have a pattern or design.
Me: Totally messing with you.  They were in the room when we went in.  Couldn’t help myself.
Ber:  Ok good.  They are ugly!
Me: Sure are.
Me:   Also some guy in my contact list also got the second picture because his last name is Berns and I selected his name instead of yours because I was laughing so hard.
Ber: I just choked on my water.

I was right in thinking Mr. B wouldn’t find this whole thing nearly as hilarious as I do (he also requested I find a way to un-sync our phones).  But lucky for me, he is used to me being ridiculous.

Have fun, be silly, and thank you for keeping me In Good Company.

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